兴奋剂是通才的杀手
2 分•作者: anonymous-bear•14 天前
我从小就被诊断患有多动症（ADHD），并被开了兴奋剂来“治疗”。当时我大约7岁，完全不明白发生了什么，也从未质疑过。快进18年：经过大量的内省，我很高兴地说，我现在所处的位置并非我所期望的。
兴奋剂是有代价的。
我逐渐意识到，患有多动症的人通常是：
- 善于观察
- 善于社交
- 通才
我也注意到，我变成了：
- 专才
- 行尸走肉
- 反社交
“被困住”=专才。
我痛恨专精。它很脆弱。纵观历史，通才才是王者。企业家都是通才。我想成为一名企业家。
我现在有一份工作，是软件工程师。我开始思考，如果我停用兴奋剂，我该怎么办？我一点也不认同我现在的生活。我一定会找到出路的。
我并非内向之人，却在不知不觉中变得像个内向者。看到别人社交而自己却感到格格不入，这种孤立感很强烈。
我通过反复试验证实了这一切：停用兴奋剂，又重新开始服用。
在20多岁时发现自己与想象中的完全不同，这是一种奇特的发现。
当你第一次以最原始的视角看待世界时，世界变得美妙。食物尝起来无比美味。瞬间变得充满魔力和力量。让别人发笑并进行深入交谈时，感觉浑身充满活力。我不相信有多少人能如此突然地体验到这种差异。
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From a young age, I was prescribed stimulants to 'treat' a strong case of ADHD. Being ~7 at the time, I had no clue what was going on. Never really questioned it either. Fast forward 18 years: through a lot of introspection, I can happily say I am not in a position I'd like to be in.<p>Stimulants come at tradeoffs.<p>I've come to realize that people with ADHD are:
- Observant
- Social
- Generalist<p>I've also come to notice that I am:
- Specialist
- Zombie
- Anti Social<p>"Locked-in" = specialist.<p>I hate specialization. Its fragile. Throughout history, generalists have reigned. Entrepreneurs are generalists. I want to be an entrepreneur.<p>I work a job now. Software Engineering. Im left wondering, what will I do if I leave the stimulants? I dont vouch for the life I live, at all. I will find a way out of it.<p>Im not an introvert. Yet I've grown as one. Its isolating, seeing people socialize and strangely feeling out of place.<p>I've confirmed all of this through trial and error. Dropping the stimulants, going back on them.<p>Its an odd discovery in your 20s that you are a completely different person than you had thought.<p>The world becomes beautiful when you see it raw for the first time. Food tastes wonderful. Moments become magical and powerful. It feels tingly to make someone laugh and converse deeply. I dont believe there are many people who've experienced the difference so suddenly.